Dear friend!
I know everything of how you got the deep shock, suddenly remembering what you knew long, long before you got your physical and mental cases which cover your soul [atma]. The deep longing for Her seva – because She serves Him – you cherish in your heart, and this you expressed very beautifully, but one thing you must carefully listen to, promise me to listen to – you may like it or not!

Nothing can be gained by running away from the unpleasant world in which we live, by diving and plunging into the bliss of realization. Our spiritual happiness is quite unimportant, rather an impediment. Her and His happiness is everything. Even with the greatest enthusiasm and inspite of all trances of bliss we must go step by step, otherwise we believe we are on a high stage but are only on an emotional, mind made stage.

There is a simple self test; try to think like this: I, my mind, body, soul, house, husband, children are His property. I am like a trustee appointed by Him and obliged to see that His property is kept well and prospers. – We must stand with both legs in this world of bitter realities and try to make it fragrant with Krishna’s fragrance.

Chaitanya Mahaprabhu’s and His coplayers’ lives are lives of great self restraint and they rather feel shy of ectasies, hiding them from the sight of even their deepest friends. The pure soul, the atma, in every being is His dasa, Her dasi, only their minds do not know it. As Her dasis and His dasas we must be better citizens, better husbands, better wives, better children than everybody else. We must serve first with what is known to us, our body, mind, family members, and consider them as means, ingredients of His seva. They cease to be opaque then, become transparent, and may turn then into His sevakas, too.

I heard much about you and I should be there with you all, I know. In the meantime, do all your routine work with a smile – knowing you do it for Her sake, reserve a bit of spare time for reading, study seriously whatever Vamandas may suggest. Krishna’s realm, His figure, Her figure are more subtle than a figure made of a wave of thought, and more full of life than the most energetic youth of this world.

As soon as you feel you lose yourself in some trance, quickly get up, do some routine work and sing His Name along with a smile. Do not get in the trap of emotion, which are beautiful to us, but His pleasure accrues from serving Him, which has to be learnt and which is hard and dry, like tilled, frozen earth. He will sprout out from the ground then, not your feelings.

Forgive these lines. I know how I got such ecstasies and had to learn to push them aside.
In the One seva,
Your Sadananda

P.S.I am so glad to hear about your progress, but I want the roots to go deeper, otherwise, the creeper will quickly grow too high and be broken!
Radhe! Radhe!
(Letter from Svami Sadananda Dasa in 1954)